Reality is Harder than Memory
by RetroKenobi
Summary: Luke Skywalker tries his absolute hardest to keep his mind off of his happier life, but the memories always prevail.


Luke Skywalker sits on the same uncomfortable rock as always as he stares out across the seemingly endless ocean. He closes his eyes, taking in the ever so rare feeling of bliss. The sound of waves crashing in the distance blending in with the sound of animals singing, it's almost heaven. _Almost._ Soon the flashbacks sneak in and remind him of everything that happened that has caused him to be here on this island alone.

* * *

 _Fire, burning all around. The cracking sound of it not loud enough to drown out the cries of all his students. He lies on the ground, daring not to get up and see the consequences of his failure. If only he had payed more attention to him… Been a better teacher…_

* * *

Luke shoots his eyes open, sparing himself from the heart wrenching memories that play in his mind like a broken record. He decides to get up and walk around, give an attempt at relaxation.

The old Jedi ends up at the bottom of the island at a small beach-type area. He sits on the sand just close enough to run his fingertips across the freezing water. Luke closes his eyes, still running his fingers through the icy substance.

* * *

 _Luke laughs as he hurries to create another snowball before Han or Ben can attack him once more. As he is straightening back up to launch his attack, he feels a hit on his back and hears laughter behind him. He turns and sees his nephew with a bright smile on his face. Luke can't help but smile too as he throws snow towards his small nephew._

* * *

Skywalker opens his eyes, smiling from the bittersweet moment that feels like it took place centuries ago. He remembers every detail of that winter. It was the one before Ben started his Jedi training. When spring came along, Leia hosted a party for her son. Luke laughs as he recalls Han popping a hole in the bounce-house and ruining all of the children's fun.

Luke misses his family greatly. Someday's he gets really close to going back home to them. He stops himself, however, because if he's honest, he's scared too. For all he knows they're mad at him and don't want to see him, or, there's the unthinkable… they're dead. Luke shakes that thought off, but the one with them being angry at him lingers.

A low rumble from the Jedi's stomach tells him he should probably walk back up to his small home.

* * *

As Luke sits at the table eating Crouton, yet another memory comes flying at him. This one taking place on Life Day, just a little bit before the incident…

* * *

 _Luke and Ben sit at the dinner table, waiting patiently for Han and Leia to finish the food. Skywalker is surprised Han is actually helping Leia, normally he's napping. Then again, she probably threatened to take away his Falcon privileges… there's a long story behind that._

 _Han chuckles as he picks up a scoop, holding it as a microphone._

" _Han…" Leia says._

 _Being himself, Solo ignores her and proceeds to start singing into the scoop. "I don't want a lot fo-"_

 _Leia calmly takes the object from Han's hand and sets it down._

" _So, no karaoke yet?" Solo tries to joke, but silence tells him he should go sit down._

* * *

Luke laughs at the memory as he puts his plate in the wash-bin, which triggers another one.

* * *

" _Hey, kid! Could ya help me wash dishes?" Luke hears Han call from the kitchen._

" _Sure…" Luke takes a stack of dishes and a sponge and starts scrubbing._

 _As Han is putting more soap on the sponge, bubbles are emitted from the bottle. He can't help but chuckle. "Bubbles."_

 _Luke looks over at his old, but a bit childish, friend. "Bubbles are good."_

 _Han puts down his sponge and squeezes the soap bottle for more bubbles. Luke doesn't know why, but bubbles are just amusing. He decides to join in, getting another bottle of soap from the cabinet._

" _Kriff!" Luke hears Han exclaim. He looks over to see the bottle busted open, soap all over the floor._

 _Solo hurries for the mop on the other side of the room, but slips. Luke laughs at his brother-in-law's distress, but shushes when his sister walks in._

* * *

Tears well up in Luke's eyes as he thinks of all the fiascos he and Han got into, sometimes Leia would get caught up in them somehow.

The feeling of wanting to go back home hits Skywalker once more, and this time he tells himself no, but for a different reason. Reality is harder than memory.


End file.
